05.29.2007 AUSTRALIA GETTING ICE BLUE DS LITE

I still have yet to see a pink DS Lite in America, yet a new color is arriving in Australia soon. I suppose a light blue DS Lite will sell better than a generally girly color, although I'd still take a white or black handheld over any fancy color. Might as well just get a flashy decal. If you live in Australia, you can pick up an "Ice Blue" DS Lite starting July 19th in stores, for a limited time at $199.95 each.

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05.24.2007 DS HELPS JAPANESE STUDENTS IN SCHOOL

As usual, the kids over in Japan have found another way to work video games into their daily lives:

All the secondary schools in the city of Yawata in Kyoto have officially started using the Nintendo DS as an educational teaching tool for the English language. They held a trial run with a smaller group of 3rd year secondary school students over a period of 5 months, and have found that the vocabulary of the students increased by an average of 40 percent over the test period. Seeing the impressive test results, they decided to officially introduce it to all 2nd year secondary school students in the city. 

Students in the UK were also able to coerce their teachers into using handhelds for educational purposes recently. And then there's us Americans, who bring PSPs to school to look at porn and get the "PlayStation Pornables" banned in schools across the nation. There's a DS game coming out in Japan next week that's called The Narrow Way to the Deep North by Pencil, and you get to learn Japanese poetry by tracing over the Kanji that's written on the screen, which triggers the narrator audio to read the poem for you. American students should use this game to start the handheld education excuse tactics, and start reversing the classroom rules here before it's too late.

comments disabled | Digg This Tags: DS LITE, JAPAN, NINTENDO, SCHOOLS, STUDENTS

05.21.2007 NINTENDO WII AND DS RELEASE SCHEDULE

Nintendo gave us a Wii game release date list and a DS game release date list not too long ago, and as the temperature rises outdoors they can sense our indoor worries of a Nintendo drought approaching. Here's the reassuring updates, the first two games on the Wii list are the big ones worth remembering:

Wii
July 30 Mario Strikers Charged Nintendo
Aug. 20 Metroid Prime 3 Corruption Nintendo
September Battalion Wars 2 Nintendo
Aug. 14 High School Musical: Sing It! Disney Interactive Studios
Aug. 14 Madden NFL '08 EA
August Tiger Woods PGA Tour '08 EA
August Space Station Tycoon Namco Bandai
August Brunswick Pro Bowling Crave
August Dave Mirra BMX Challenge Crave
August Pinball Hall of Fame: The Williams Collection Crave
September Brothers in Arms Ubisoft
September Looney Tunes: Acme Arsenal Warner Bros.
September George of the Jungle Crave
Fall Boogie EA

In other words, we get Mario Strikers Charged, and then we're on our own all Summer. Then we get Metroid Prime 3: Corruption and are forced to ration wisely until Winter, which better be when Super Mario Galaxy is finally released. This plan should work well though, it will give Nintendo games each month to feel proud about, and then when we inevitably get bored this Summer, PlayStation 3 should finally have some great games for us to try. For the shit ton of upcoming Nintendo DS games on the way, go here and scroll all the way down. The one most of you are probably looking forward to is Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Trials and Tribulations, which Capcom has moved up to an August release.

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05.04.2007 LEGEND OF ZELDA NINTENDO DS LITE MOD

You've seen the Legend of Zelda Wii mod, and this is the same thing, but with a DS Lite and different colors. Not much to say, but it's worth looking at, and knowing that it's on eBay for fucking $660 bucks. Jeez.

To fill up some space I'll let you in on an embarrassing secret of mine. Some of my friends are lame dorks, and for some reason they're convinced that saying "that's how I rule" is a way of solving things with pure testosterone. Being the man that I am, it's the gayest shit ever and drives me nuts to hear people say it, no matter how small or joking they might be. So one day my friend and I got into a dispute over whether or not Link ever fucked Epona in between a cut-scene and gameplay. My friend argued to no end that it was impossible, totally overlooking the fact that maybe the last note of Epona's song has been missing all along, and that's why a damn horse comes running across the land whenever you start sticking your fingers in holes and blowing to get a song playing - Ocarina of it's Time to get dirty!

Yet you disappoint and mount Epona all wrong every single time without finishing the song. My friend refused to believe it was even possible, and boomed out nonsensically "Cuz that's how I rule," which pushed me to such an extreme of hate and bad emotional judgement to declare back at him, "Oh, yah, well this is how HY-rule!" I've regretted it ever since. Although in my defense, it's still not as gay as saying "This is how I rule." That is all. There will be a test on Monday, so make sure you study.

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comments disabled | Digg This Tags: DS LITE, HYRULE, MOD, NINTENDO, ZELDA

04.10.2007 DS LITES THAT ARE AS EXPENSIVE AS A PS3

Damn, most DS owners will be lucky to have one Diamond or one Pearl copy of Pokemon, and Swarovski already has DS Lites made that are covered in real crystals. They made a ritzy puke pink DS for Paris Hilton in the past, and I'm sure she plays it all the time. The DS cover above is for display only at the Nintendo World Store in New York City, but the other four in the gallery below are all for sale at the price of $600 each.

Spending that much cash on the PS3 was hard enough, there's no way I could blow that much cash on something that'll just break eventually. The first rapper that has one of these in his music videos gains no respect from me. Unless he breaks it in two pieces, uses them as gamer earrings gifts, and then yanks around his hoe while playing it on her head. That's the best way I can think of dealing with an unruly girl gamer, a stylus through each ear has to hurt.

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comments disabled | Digg This Tags: CRYSTALS, DS LITE, EXPENSIVE, NINTENDO, SWAROVSKI

03.23.2007 NINTENDO DS CAKE

I've been so damn busy this week, and in a few hours that all comes to an end. Spring break, it's almost here. What do you guys plan on playing over break? I'll be on my DS often, but not until I get through God of War II finally. I might also hop on Ragnarok Online for a night or two, and for some reason I really want to some of my Nintendo 64 games again.

This edible art is one of the better gaming cakes I've ever seen - making a dual screen dessert has to be hard. With console or controller cakes it's easy to figure out where to put the candles, but this one is more tricky. Sticking the candles in the touch screen could melt the top display, and if the hinge breaks you could blow its top off when making a wish. I like the precision in this piece, but I'd prefer a console of larger proportions to fill me up.

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03.08.2007 UPCOMING DS GAME RELEASE DATES

Nintendo also sent out an official list of DS release dates for the next few months. Here's what you've got to look forward to:

  • April 22 Pokemon Diamond and Pokemon Pearl Nintendo
  • May Pirates of the Caribbean 3 Buena Vista
  • May Dragon Ball Z: Harukanaru Densetsu Atari
  • May Pony Friends Eidos
  • May Diner Dash Eidos
  • May Touch the Dead Eidos
  • June 4 Nintendo DS browser Nintendo
  • June 4 Planet Puzzle League Nintendo
  • June 11 Touchmaster DS Midway
  • June Zendoku Eidos
  • Spring Naruto Ninja Council 3 Tomy
  • Spring Time Ace Konami
  • Spring Death Jr. and the Science Fair of Doom Konami
  • Q2 Rune Factory: A Fantasy Harvest Moon Natsume
  • Summer Shrek the Third Activision
  • Summer Transformers: Autobots Activision
  • Summer Transformers: Decepticons Activision

The DS was on fire over the winter with a variety of titles to choose from, but it looks like their list is finally freezing over. After Pokemon Diamond/Pearl, the  only games to look forward to are the new Harvest Moon and maybe Death Jr. I'm sure Shrek and Pirates 3 will outsell almost of the ones on the list though, just because they're movie video games. The handheld game I'm most looking forward to is still Zelda: Phantom Hourglass, but that won't be out until late 2007.

I don't see why they can't give us a new Mario handheld game every year - I understand that Miyamoto will only make a new console Mario game when he's got a new gameplay idea to work off of, but there's nothing wrong with reusing the assets from the New Super Mario Bros. game to make a new sidescrolling platformer every year.

comments disabled | Digg This Tags: DS LITE, NINTENDO, POKEMON, RELEASE DATES, SCHEDULE

03.08.2007 GDC 07: DS OPERA BROWSER ANNOUNCEMENT

Sony set a high bar yesterday at the Game Developers Conference, and whether you think their PlayStation Home service sounds cool or not, it was still a lot of news packed into one day. Nintendo's day to shine just started and they've gone on record to say that the DS Opera Web browser will be available in America on June 4th. The browser retails for $32 in Japan and $52 in Europe, but no U.S. prices have been mentioned yet. As cool as surfing the net on a handheld might be, I doubt it will be too successful - you can bookmark sites, but online Flash, audio, and video is out of the question. You can see pictures, but won't be able to save them. We all know that the Internet is for porn, so good luck Nintendo.

comments disabled | Digg This Tags: DS LITE, GDC 2007, NINTENDO, OPERA, WEB BROWSING

02.19.2007 POKEMON DIAMOND AND PEARL STYLUS

Oh boy, if you thought Pokemon Diamond was cool, then consider this Miles Davis. If you've been hesitant to get back into Pokemon series then this might be the DS deal to get you interested. A special edition DS stylus for free with the pre-order purchase of Diamond or Pearl - there's a different stylus version for each game. And there's even a DS stylus holder that looks like the Super Mega Aggro Crag trophy from that Nintendo GUTS show. The catch? You have to buy it from EB Games or GameStop - don't do it! Watch this instead and forget I ever mentioned it! Pokemon Diamond and Pearl are still scheduled for an April 22nd release, so more collectibles might be on the way.

comments disabled | Digg This Tags: DIAMOND, DS LITE, NINTENDO, PEARL, POKEMON

01.19.2007 HOTEL DUSK: ROOM 215 GAMEPLAY

Cing, the game company that made the mediocre Trace Memory for the Nintendo DS, has another artsy mystery game coming out soon. With a release on Monday, this game follows a cop turned salesman (bad career move) who is tracking down a missing friend. Typical, lame, pffft, fuck that. But the thing that really looks unique is how you play the game - by tipping your DS sideways and holding it like a book. Nintendo gimmick? Watch the video and you'll immediately see how interesting and useful the side by side vertical screens can be.

The black and white character cut outs aren't quite as cool looking as Scanner Darkly, but still artistic enough to stand out from the pretty good looking backgrounds. The map system looks solid, and if there's enough challenging puzzles then this game might be fun even if the plot remains mediocre the whole way through. The hotel is supposed to 'grant wishes' so the game runs the risk of becoming too fruity to be fun, but from the looks of things I'm leaning towards an optimistic outcome.

comments disabled | Digg This Tags: CING, DS LITE, HOTEL DUSK: ROOM 215, PUZZLES, TRACE MEMORY

"The Last Boss" is a blog focused on finding the most entertaining gaming news, gossip, and media on the net.

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